I did it - Day One of IVF Shots By Myself

Wow - I honestly cannot believe I did it.

I spent almost the entire day reading infertility blogs and waiting for 9 pm to come around. After the "dry run" with Carlos last night, I knew I could probably maybe do it. (How's that for confidence?) I called several friends to catch up during the day, but didn't get to talk to a few of them and generally spent the day alone. But I really was enjoying myself. And didn't feel particularly lonely. especially since Carlos just left several hours ago.

So, when I got a call from a good friend (and a former infertile) that I had NOT called, and I started crying as soon as she said hello, we both wondered what was wrong with me. I said, through the tears, "Thank you for calling. I'm just so happy that you called." I will blame it on the hormones, even though I hadn't been feeling them up until that point.

Once I stopped blubbering, we had a great conversation.. and then we actually talked up until it was time to do the meds, so I put her on speakerphone, and she was there for me while I did my three shots. And was the voice of reason when I had a little mishap. The needle was in my skin, but the plunger was not going in. "It's not working," I said. It won't push down." She calmly said, "OK, take the needle out of your skin and draw back some air and then try to move the plunger again." Of course, that worked, so who knows why it wasn't working the first time. Hmmmm.. user error, perhaps? User anxiety? Most definitley.

So, I did them all, one by one, and then cleaned up after myself. I didn't realized there was so much pre-cleaning and post cleaning involved. Carlos has been doing everything. while I get to lay there. (I do my shots laying down. My freind said, "Are you kidding? I did them in the bathroom mirror at work." Okay, so I'm a baby, I admit it. However, I am a baby who did her shots by herself tonight. Take that.

So, now I am going to have some tea and watch Desperate Housewives.