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Monday, May 25, 2009

Tomorrow is the Day!

Well, here we are Monday night. I had my first beta yesterday. As you know, we have no results yet.

And I still have not taken an HPT yet. Carlos does not want me to, and I have not been terribly tempted because we don't have any here at the house. AND, we went grocery shopping tonight, and I would have maybe not been able to resist buying one, but we went to Trader Joe's. They have Mochi ice cream, amazing kettle corn, and 19 cent bananas, but they have no home pregnancy tests.

So, I have to wait until tomorrow. I asked yesterday what time we should expect the lab results from the second beta, and the woman taking my blood really had no idea. I really don't want them to call me at work and want to get out of a meeting to take the call, or have to find a private place to call back and then have to potentially deal with bad news at work. This stresses me out.

So we have a solution. We will tell them to call Carlos and tell him. Don't call me, call him. Then I will not wait for a call at work all day, and Carlos can tell me when I get home. It might be fun for him. Or it will really really suck for him. Either way, I would rather hear the news from him than the clinic.

And I remember fantasizing, uh, well, actually planning how I was going to tell Carlos we were expecting back when we were trying to get pregnant by actually having sexual intercourse. There are lots of cute little very cheesy ways people use to tell their spouses. I probably googled "how to tell your husband you are pregnant" a hundred times. Yes, even before I was even one day late.

Now, he can figure out how to tell me, whatever the news. And google ain't no help. I already checked.

As far as the news, I really have no, no idea. I don't know what it's like to be pregnant, so I don't know if I feel pregnant. I don't even know if I would feel symptoms this early anyway. Another blogger who got a BFP on an HPT described several symptoms, (and I am so so thrilled for her!!) but I don't think I'm feeling any of those. Definitely not feeling nauseous or any pains in my uterus (whatever that would feel like) My breasts might be tender, but honestly I've been wearing a bra 24 hours a day since Day 6 of stims, so I really don't know. I did however, have a horrible bout of constipation, which technically IS a pregnancy symptom. However, it's caused by the the progesterone, and I can't assume my body is making progesterone to support the pregnancy, since I'm putting three doses a day of progesterone inside of me.

And I'm tired sometimes but it's Memorial Day weekend. Not working, shopping all day, and spending time in the sun can do that to a person.

Speaking of Memorial Day, we had a good weekend, and for the most part, I didn't start getting really anxious until today. At church yesterday, I had a really good "It's-all-in-God's-hands" feeling and felt comforted that God would have a reason if it's a negative. I know that God has a plan for us, and He will take care of us no matter what happens.

And I am so thankful for all that we are blessed with. And especially thankful, that all things considered, this has really not been a bad experience so far. The doctors and nursing staff have been wonderful, family and the few friends that know have been amazingly supportive and loving. I have felt real care and concern from wonderful women from all over the internets who have shared comments and nice thoughts. My body responded well to the meds, I didn't have any major side effects, the shots that I freaked out about were not.that.bad.at.all, and oh yeah, we have insurance and some financial resources, and we won't go broke if and when we need to do this all over again. Oh yeah, and I'm thankful for our "embies on ice" that we can use if needed.

So, I'm trying to prepare myself for whatever happens. I've read enough sad, sad blogs to know that anything can happen at any time. And I just want to know what's happening now. With us. With these two little sweet embryos, one boy and one girl that were put inside of me last Monday.

I'll let you all know when I know. Thanks for listening.

6 comments:

chrys said...

i have thought about you a TON this weekend! i'm praying for you and will be so excited to hear news. much love.

sophia said...

Thinking lots of good thoughts for you! xoxo

donna said...

I'm thinking of you and sending all the good vibes your way I can!

Brenna said...

So, so excited to hear your outcome. I think I'm bit more tuned in to my symptoms this time around only because now I've been pregnant once before. Last time around, I was crying the weekend before our beta because I was convinced that my period was on the way! It felt just the same to me then. So don't skip a beat over what you might or might not be feeling--just try to relax until you hear those results today. I have all fingers and toes crossed for you all!!!

Michele said...

many warm thoughts and prayers

Hillary said...

So excited to hear if it's good news. Sending good vibes and prayers your way!